Henri Frederic Amiel

Life is short
And we do not have much time
To gladden the hearts of those who travel the dark way with us;
So be swift to love,
And make haste to be kind,
And may the Divine Mystery
Who is beyond our ability to know
but Who made us and Who loves us,
and Who travels with us,
Bless us and keep us in peace.
Amen.

The way It Is by William Stafford

There’s a thread you follow. It goes among
things that change. But it doesn’t change.
People wonder about what you are pursuing.
You have to explain about the thread.
But it is hard for others to see.
While you hold it you can’t get lost.
Tragedies happen; people get hurt
or die; and you suffer and get old.
Nothing you do can stop time’s unfolding.
You don’t ever let go of the thread.

Watch Over

Watch Over your child, O Lord as his days increase. Bless and guide him wherever he may be, keeping him unspotted from the world. Strengthen him when he stands, comfort him when he is discouraged or sorrowful; raise him up when he falls. And in his heart, may Thy peace, which passes all understanding, abide all the days of his life. Through Christ our Lord,

Amen.

A Silly Little Girl

Here's the story of a silly little girl who needed to learn how to ask for help. God decided to teach her (did i say teach? I meant beat her over the head with) this lesson.

she's on her own. unemployed. no place to land. but she has many loving and giving friends who are aching to support her, give her love and care and shelter until she finds her feet again.

repeatedly she has to ask for help. "can i stay with you?" "may i borrow your car?" she bounces around frequently because she doesn't want to be a burden anywhere for long. it's all internal, this sense of burdening. and it shifts her perspective on these relationships - she's not there because she was invited, because she is wanted. she's there because she has nowhere else to go and needs to be there. this is a very sad and insecure place to be. yet another lesson here to be learned...

God is teaching her how to ask for help. how to accept it and let others love her. how to love herself enough to embrace their care.

the silly little girl has been practicing this dependence for months. she is tired of moving around and unsuccessful at finding work, even work that she is overqualified for. more humility, more asking for help from those around her.

She feels like she's learned this lesson by now. she knows how to ask for help. and is learning a lot about self love and true relationship.

She has a total breakdown. "God help me. I'm sinking. I can't do this anymore. I'm tired of this lesson. Is this not working because I'm following the wrong path? Tell me where to go. Tell me what to do. I can't do this by myself anymore. Please help."

She goes to the garden to pull weeds and within an hour, the phone starts to ring. Five interview requests, four interviews set up in the next four days.

God has a funny way of teaching us. You see, the silly little girl thought that God was just driving home the message that she needed to learn how to ask her friends and loved ones for help. and that was part of it. but it wasn't until that last day that she fully surrendered and asked GOD for help.

We can't always do it alone. We don't have to.

Wisdom for the Day

"People follow different paths, straight or crooked, according to their temperament, depending on which they consider best, or most appropriate - and all reach You, just as rivers enter the ocean."

from the Upanishads

puzzle

life can be an absolute puzzle. i can search for hours for the borders, separate the pieces into color, and work so hard to complete sections and see what big picture they're trying to form. but no matter how hard i look, i don't find the right pieces. and then, miraculously, they appear as if from nowhere and finish off sections of incompleteness.

this is the gray area where God can work miracles. limbo, uncertainty, and doubt can be a blessed thing.

:)

Have a HOLY weekend!! and happy Easter, a bit early...

new favorite poem

I came across this recently in a book called Love Poems From God and I keep returning to it. enjoy!


"There is a Beautiful Creature
Living in a hole you have dug.
So at night
I set fruit and grains
And little pots of wine and milk
Besides your soft earthen mounds,

And I often sing.

But still, my dear,
You do not come out.

I have fallen in love with Someone
Who hides inside you.

We should talk about this problem--

Otherwise,
I will never leave you alone."
— Hafiz

notable, quotable... worth sharing

As the American dream goes, we can do anything we set our minds to accomplish. There is no limit to what we can accomplish when we combine ingenuity, imagination, and innovation with skill and hard work. . . In direct contradiction to the American dream, God actually delights in exalting our inability. He intentionally puts his people in situations where they come face to face with their need for God. In the process he powerfully demonstrates his ability to provide everything his people need in ways they never could have mustered up or imagined. –from Radical by David Platt

the lake

I'm so glad that I had time yesterday to ride to and around the lake. There's nothing like a quiet, ipod-free 13 mile bike ride alongside peaceful water to clear your head and get you pumped for the rest of the day. While I really enjoy this quite time to myself - going at my own pace, taking it all in without talking, explaining, pointing out the things I see - I should also probably invest in some mace if I'm going to keep this up... :)

On another note, but related to that bike ride along my ADD brainwaves, I'm working really hard to learn to love myself. To stay centered and present in the moment, to identify anxiety, fear, rejection, sadness, excitement, happiness, love, and others as I'm feeling them in my body. To say "hey you! I hear you, I feel you, I acknowledge that you are here and am going to look for what it is that's got you talking!" And to the less pleasant "managers" (most often, for me, anxiety and fear), I get to quiet them by paying attention. Since I'm almost a stranger to myself when it comes to being present within myself in the moment, I have to actively "check in" throughout the day. It's like a meditative break every hour or so just to pay attention to what's up.. Anyway - it sounds pretty hokey, but it's working well for me.

My bike ride yesterday was like an hour and a half long "check in" on steroids. It makes me consider a silent retreat in the near(ish) future. We fill up our lives with television, computers, movies, music, smart phones, games, talking, etc and all of those things are wonderful and I use almost all of them daily! But the next time you're in the car or exercising - try silence. Meditation, contemplative prayer, or "checking in" instead of an audio book, the radio, a phone call to friends & family, or your ipod. It's uncomfortable at first, but quickly becomes addictive. It's so rewarding to take back some time in the day just for yourself; to be present in the moment and pay attention.

Love to you all
Anne

Lent

We're back in Lent already - this year has flown by and brought so many changes. Yesterday, at the Ash Wednesday service, we were reminded that "thou art dust, and to dust thou shalt return." When we remember our mortality in such a way, I begin to focus on our short time here in our bodies and in this life. Immediately, I am overwhelmed by the gift of life. How precious and how wonderful! It makes me want to be more intentional about every moment and avoid the rut of routine and the wastefulness of television, facebook, etc.

In Lent, we are remembering Jesus' time in the desert resisting temptation and preparing for his passion and resurrection. Many people choose to observe a "Holy Lent" which for some means self-denial, fasting, self-examination, repentance, meditation, or prayer... others add daily devotions or good habits. This year, I've given up beer (i know, i gave my parents so much crap for giving up wine last year and not "alcohol" but here i am) and I've taken on daily journaling - hence my renewed attention to this blog. :) I won't write here every day, but sometimes it will be here - so get excited!

Goodnight!

A Poem from Mary Oliver

Mockingbirds

This morning
two mockingbirds
in the green field
were spinning and tossing

the white ribbons
of their songs
into the air.
I had nothing

better to do
than listen.
I mean this
seriously.

In Greece,
a long time ago,
an old couple
opened their door

to two strangers
who were,
it soon appeared,
not men at all,

but gods.
It is my favorite story--
how the old couple
had almost nothing to give

but their willingness
to be attentive--
but for this alone
the gods loved them

and blessed them--
when they rose
out of their mortal bodies,
like a million particles of water

from a fountain,
the light
swept into all the corners
of the cottage,

and the old couple,
shaken with understanding,
bowed down--
but still they asked for nothing

but the difficult life
which they had already.
And the gods smiled, as they vanished,
clapping their great wings.

Wherever it was
I was supposed to be
this morning--
whatever it was I said

I would be doing--
I was standing
at the edge of the field--
I was hurrying

through my own soul,
opening its dark doors--
I was leaning out;
I was listening.

Copyright © 1994 by The Atlantic Monthly Company. All rights reserved. The Atlantic Monthly; February 1994; Mockingbirds; Volume 273, No. 2; page 80. Online Source

Listen, you are beloved

This is from Jean Vanier and quotes the Heavenly Voice at Jesus' baptism

In one of our communities, there is a man called Pierre who has a mental handicap. One day someone asked him, "Do you like praying?" He answered, "Yes". He was asked what he did when he prayed. He answered, "Listen." And what does God say to you?" "He says, 'You are my beloved son.'"

All Shall Be Well

It is such a comfort to think about God. Life doesn't always go the way i think it should, but it's nice to remember that there is something much larger, a force more powerful, a never ending supply of warmth, love, forgiveness, and beauty. Someone else who is ultimately responsible for the way the world works. Someone else who created us to be the imperfect beings that we are. And God probably has a purpose in that, although it beats me exactly what that is sometimes. It is a comfort to think maybe, even though we enjoy free will, that God has put down a path to follow (although I must say that it feels pretty dimly lit and is full of surprises). So often, like right now, I feel like I'm stumbling along that path like a drunk, weaving back and forth into the brush and thorns on either side, but I think I'm still moving in the right direction and think I'm mostly following the right path. I hope so, anyhow. Even in the dark parts, I don't think I'd have life any other way.

Julian of Norwich is responsible for one of my favorite quotes. I'll leave it with you as I keep singing it to myself...

God once said to Julian, "All shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of things shall be well!"

Goodnight!